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Accountancy Shanty Lyrics

Artist: Monty Python

LEAD PIRATE:
Full speed ahead, Mr. Cohen!

CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium. Up, up, up your premium.
PIRATE:
Scribble away!
CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.
PIRATE:
And balance the books.
CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.
PIRATE:
Scribble away!
CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.
PIRATE:
But manage the books.
CHORUS:
Up, up, up.

PIRATES:
It's fun to charter an accountant
And sail the wide accountancy,
To find, explore the funds offshore
And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy!

It can be manly in insurance.
We'll up your premium semi-annually.
It's all tax deductible.
We're fairly incorruptible,
We're sailing on the wide accountancy!

LEAD PIRATE:
Oh, this is fun, Mr. Cohen!
PIRATE:
Sail away!...
CHORUS:
Up, up, up...
LEAD PIRATE:
Fetch me another exotic salute. To port! Bring her port to shell out! And the medium guys shell out to port! Balance the books! Bring me another small shellfish, Mr. Cohen...

Comments/Interpretations

by Eddie on 8/16/2008 4:51pm
Fetch me another exotic salute.
SHOULD BE
Fetch me another exotic SHAROOT.
= cigar

by Fraser on 2/15/2009 9:58pm
*cheroot

by d munns on 7/18/2009 6:00am
there is a second verse you have missed and goes like this:

We are the studio accountants
we use computers and the fax
we make them pay every way
and then we write it off for tax

creative agents cannot touch us
and lawers are a joke dear let's be frank

they'll never ever sue us
so let the barstards sue us
we'er laughing all the way clear to the bank

by ChapelGrl on 10/6/2009 4:36pm
no, no! You've got it all wrong! The line is:

"Fetch me another exotic cheroot! To port! Bring a port to sherry! And a medium dry sherry to port! Balance the Books! Bring me another small cheroot, Mr. Cohen"

by davo on 6/8/2011 3:59pm
there are actually several errors in the text above. It should read:
Fetch me another exotic charoot. To port! Bring her port to sherry! And a medium dry sherry to port! Balance the books! Bring me another small charoot, Mr. Cohen...

by KayStan on 3/9/2013 10:49pm
2nd line, second verse - should be - We'll compound you semi-annually.